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Thursday, 30 May 2013

Pokello Nare: Why the hatred Zimbos??

Ok, so, I have exams in like 3 days and I'm knee deep in E-Marketing and Corporate Governance notes, but tjo! I just had comment about this utterly amazing venom that is being spewed left right and centre about Pokello Nare, the Zimbabwean female representative in Season 8 of Big Brother Africa. Haters even have enough time to make up and entire Facebook page called Bring Pornello Home. Lol! Peeps have time yo! Not only that, I've just checked out the page and it has 4,374 likes! Having gone through the posts a bit I realise a lot of those likes are from her supporters who also want to comment on the page.

First of all it's obvious that a lot of these sad people do not actually know the meaning of the word porn. Please can they Google it and educated themselves. Naked people do not equal porn. A man and a woman doing what grown ups do the comfort of their own bedroom (even without the headboard hehehe) does not equal porn. Yes they recorded it and yes the tape leaked. I don't know if that tape really leaked or if it was a publicity stunt but hey, that's not the point here. I'm not a friend of hers and don't know her from a bar of soap but as far as I'm concerned, she is a Zimbabwean first before anything anyone might care to call her and she is repping my country on that show. To me that means I will support her, sex tape or no sex tape, step-daughter of a minister or otherwise, she is a Zimbabwean first!

As a Zimbabwean, she has my vote!


Hanzi heeee she is not the ideal person to send to BBA because of her "questionable" morals. Who did you want to go? Mai Charamba? Or perhaps one of the female gospel artists with a "clean" history? Really? No, really? If it wasn't sad it would be funny to note that 90% of these people who want her to come home are women. PHd sydrome at it's best. I actually think the owner of that page has a serious personal vendetta coz eish, the emotion coming through from some of the posts!! People should not act like they haven't done questionable things in their lives. If everything was known about everyone, we'd be shocked to see Pokello is nothing compared to some of these haters.

In another post someone was whining about how selfish she was because she said if she won she would spend the money on herself and her son. At least she is honest people. None of this "Oh I'm going to save the world and adopt the world's street kids if I win" crap.

The saddest thing for me though is that all this negative energy is coming from fellow Zimbabweans. What image of ourselves does that portray to the rest of Africa and indeed the world? If we can be so cruel to each other then what stops other nationalities from doing worse to us? Where is your patriotism dammit? 

My wish is for Zimbabwe to win this game. Let's not look at it as Pokello or Hakeem but as Zimbabwe winning. (Actually, I think it would be hillarious if Pokello won. Like she said, "Bitches will become believers!" )

Seriously Zimbos ngatikwanei hanti?

Well, my break is over. Back to hitting them books!

Thursday, 9 May 2013

Attack of the Sales People

Ok yes, I know people are out there trying to make a living and all but damn! Sometimes I just feel downright harassed by these people selling stuff. Take the vendors at the traffic lights for example. It is a crime, a CRIME I tell you, to even look in their general direction. Heaven forbid you make eye contact. Before you know it, dude is at your window with his little packets of nuts, or fruit or whatever half way inside your car. I try to shake my head politely and say no thank you. “No” is one word these guys do not understand. My “no” is met with “Haaa, ndokudzikisirai sister” (I’ll lower the price for you my sister) or “It’s just a dollar sister”. I’ll be thinking I don’t care if it’s for free; the point is I don’t want or need whatever you are selling. Sometimes I feel bad though because these are people working hard to make an honest living. They are not out there robbing people or getting involved in various nefarious activities. So I do try to support them where I can.

Use eye contact with caution!!

Then there are the shop assistants in town, especially the ones in the little Nigerian and Chinese shops that have mushroomed all over the CBD. As soon as you set foot in the door, you suddenly have a second shadow. You move, they move. You step to the right, they step to the right. He or she will be walking less than an inch behind you such that any abrupt stopping on your part will result in some very uncomfortable body contact. Awkwaaard! Anything you touch or look at will attract a price revelation from them. “Skirt iyoyo ififteen dollars chete sister.....iwayo matop ma ten dollars”. They are very helpful until they realise you are not actually going to buy anything and then it’s back to standing by door, scouting for their next victim and chatting at the top of their voices. If you leave empty handed, your exit will not be acknowledged at all.



Never ever make the mistake of going to Avondale flea marketing during week days when the stall owners have little or no sales. You have been warned!! People practically want to pull you into their stalls and FORCE you buy their goods! All you hear is “Please sister, come and take a look at what I have”...or... “I have something especially for you”...or... “Tell what you are looking for and I will find it for you”. I’m like calm down people, I’m just whiling up time here, not buying anything! Sometimes asking to look at something and then not buying it will get you with looks that could kill or even occasionally a severe telling off!

My favourites are the Indian shops, especially the fabric shops. You walk in and don’t see anyone except maybe the black dudes that measure out the fabric. You walk around, happily checking out all the merchandise and then, you get that feeling that someone is looking at you. You turn around but see no one. You think you maybe imagining things but you can definitely feel someone’s eyes, following your every move. Then suddenly you look up and there she is. Decked out in her sari she is chilling on the balcony and watching. Watching everyone in her shop. As soon as a sale is made, she magically appears at the counter to receive that cash and then disappears again. Creeepy! 

She'll be watching you like a hawk y'all!


Although they all can be highly annoying (or just really creepy), I do give all these people props for being highly persistent sales people. They wouldn’t survive otherwise. These are the types of people that can definitely sell ice to Eskimos!